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Mark Remy's DumbRunner.com

Satire You Can Trust, Since 2015

Running News from DumbRunner.com

Running news, running commentary, and running humor from DumbRunner.com, updated several times every week.

Mark Remy's DumbRunner.com
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December 04, 2020

Dumb Runner Illustrated #6: 'Bike Lane'

December 04, 2020/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #6: 'Bike Lane'

One more in an occasional series.

Read More
December 04, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Comics, Bikes, Little girls, Potty mouty
November 23, 2020

High-Stakes Gambler Goes for Morning Run Without Pooping First

November 23, 2020/ Mark Remy
High-Stakes Gambler Goes for Morning Run Without Pooping First

“I live life on the edge,” says local runner.

Read More
November 23, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Poop, Gambling, Morning run
November 20, 2020

Dumb Runner Illustrated #5: 'Marathon PR'

November 20, 2020/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #5: 'Marathon PR'

Yet another in an occasional series.


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November 20, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Marathons, PR, Rules, Comics
November 18, 2020

Longtime Friends Don't Let Political Differences Interfere With Their Running, Because They Haven't Spoken in 18 Months

November 18, 2020/ Mark Remy
Longtime Friends Don't Let Political Differences Interfere With Their Running, Because They Haven't Spoken in 18 Months

“It’s really worked out well,” says local woman.

Read More
November 18, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Politics, Friends, Running buddy
November 16, 2020

Runner’s Roommate Could Do Marathon If She Really Wanted To

November 16, 2020/ Mark Remy
Runner’s Roommate Could Do Marathon If She Really Wanted To

“All you need to do is just keep going, right?” muses local woman.

Read More
November 16, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Marathons, Desire, Motivation, Roommate, Chutzpah
November 09, 2020

No One Sure If Guy Running in Rain Is Tough or Just Dumb

November 09, 2020/ Mark Remy
No One Sure If Guy Running in Rain Is Tough or Just Dumb

Opinions vary among local residents.

Read More
November 09, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Training, Satire
Rain, Bad weather, Dumb, Tough
November 06, 2020

Dumb Runner Illustrated #4: 'Urgent Text'

November 06, 2020/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #4: 'Urgent Text'

Another in an occasional series.

Read More
November 06, 2020/ Mark Remy/
Satire, News
Comics, Phone, Text messages
October 29, 2020

Guy Dressed as Canadian Marathoner Reid Coolsaet Annoyed That No One Gets His Costume

October 29, 2020/ Mark Remy
Guy Dressed as Canadian Marathoner Reid Coolsaet Annoyed That No One Gets His Costume

“Who else could I be?” asks exasperated transplant.

Read More
October 29, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Canada, Halloween, Reid Coolsaet, Costumes, Annoyance
October 23, 2020

Dumb Runner Illustrated #3: 'New Shoes'

October 23, 2020/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #3: 'New Shoes'

Third in an occasional series.

Read More
October 23, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Comics, Shoes
October 21, 2020

Guy Who Just Took Up Running Still Has That New Runner Smell

October 21, 2020/ Mark Remy
Guy Who Just Took Up Running Still Has That New Runner Smell

Intoxicating scent attracts others.

Read More
October 21, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
New runners, Smell
October 19, 2020

Trail Runner Records Terrifying 6-Minute Encounter With Brand Ambassador

October 19, 2020/ Mark Remy
Trail Runner Records Terrifying 6-Minute Encounter With Brand Ambassador

Man escapes “chilling” wilderness experience.

Read More
October 19, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Trail running, Terror, Brand ambassador, Nuun, Promo code
October 09, 2020

Dumb Runner Illustrated #2: 'Maybe There's an App'

October 09, 2020/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #2: 'Maybe There's an App'

Second in an occasional series.

Read More
October 09, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire, Training
Comics, Training
October 05, 2020

White House Doctor Admits Trump Did Not 'Snag Top 10 Finish' in London Marathon

October 05, 2020/ Mark Remy
White House Doctor Admits Trump Did Not 'Snag Top 10 Finish' in London Marathon

Conley walks back upbeat statement from previous news conference.

Read More
October 05, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Coronavirus, COVID-19, Donald Trump, London Marathon
September 30, 2020

Ultra Runner Ultra Injured

September 30, 2020/ Mark Remy
Ultra Runner Ultra Injured

Extreme athlete “not interested in small challenges.”

Read More
September 30, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Ultras, Injuries
September 28, 2020

‘OK, That’s Pretty Cute,’ Local Runner Thinks Just Before Impact

September 28, 2020/ Mark Remy
‘OK, That’s Pretty Cute,’ Local Runner Thinks Just Before Impact

Terrier provides moment of levity as man loses consciousness.

Read More
September 28, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Dogs, Motorists, Pedestrian safety, Traffic, Accidents
September 16, 2020

Local Woman Loves to Run on Trails, Where It’s Just Her, Nature, and the Constant Simmering Rage and Despair That Is Everyone’s New Normal

September 16, 2020/ Mark Remy
Local Woman Loves to Run on Trails, Where It’s Just Her, Nature, and the Constant Simmering Rage and Despair That Is Everyone’s New Normal

“It’s my ‘me time,’” says runner.

Read More
September 16, 2020/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Real
Trail running, Rage, Nature
September 14, 2020

Man’s Virtual Boston Marathon Just Like the Real Thing If the Real Thing Were a September Event Held in Kansas and Had One Participant Whose Name Was Gordon

September 14, 2020/ Mark Remy
Man’s Virtual Boston Marathon Just Like the Real Thing If the Real Thing Were a September Event Held in Kansas and Had One Participant Whose Name Was Gordon

“Always a thrill to run Boston,” says veteran marathoner.

Read More
September 14, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Virtual race, Boston Marathon, Kansas, Coronavirus, COVID-19, Cancelation
September 09, 2020

Lab Test Reveals Local Runner Is Actually a Jogger

September 09, 2020/ Mark Remy
Lab Test Reveals Local Runner Is Actually a Jogger

Woman says she’ll “need time to process this.”

Read More
September 09, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Jogging, Joggers, Lab test, Shock
September 08, 2020

Running Elder Tells Youngsters of Things Called ‘Marathons’

September 08, 2020/ Mark Remy
Running Elder Tells Youngsters of Things Called ‘Marathons’

Spellbound children hear tales of large, phlegm-filled gatherings.

Read More
September 08, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Elders, History, COVID-19, Coronavirus, Cancelation
September 02, 2020

Eulogy Glosses Over Runner’s Pathetic PRs

September 02, 2020/ Mark Remy
Eulogy Glosses Over Runner’s Pathetic PRs

Also left unmentioned: Deceased’s numerous DNFs.

Read More
September 02, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
PR, Eulogy, Death, Funeral
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    • "Was It Fun? A Dumb Runner Comics Collection"
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Mark Remy's DumbRunner.com

DumbRunner.com is a website for runners who enjoy laughter and pie, from longtime writer and marathoner Mark Remy. Dumb Runner offers humor, insight, and 100% B.S.-free advice for runners of all abilities.

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