April 30, 2025 Local Jogger Getting Pretty Good at Guessing Time and Manner of Death April 30, 2025/ Mark Remy Self-taught expert says she can spot blunt-force trauma from 20 feet away.Read More
April 02, 2025 Deceased Runner Drowned in Own Data, Autopsy Finds April 02, 2025/ Mark Remy Fitness stats and data “just too much” for local man, says medical examiner.Read More
January 21, 2025 Nation’s Automakers Running Out of Ways to Make Trucks More Deadly January 21, 2025/ Mark Remy Today’s vehicles “about as dangerous as they can get,” says frustrated exec.Read More
January 13, 2025 Macabre Metaphor Lost on Elderly Runners January 13, 2025/ Mark Remy Local seniors near the end.Read More
June 19, 2024 Respectful Runner Hocks Massive Loogie in Cemetery as Quietly as Possible June 19, 2024/ Mark Remy Local man mouths “Sorry for your loss” to nearby mourner.Read More
March 09, 2023 Dumb Runner Illustrated #76: 'Implicit' March 09, 2023/ Mark Remy Statistics are a love language, too.Read More
March 08, 2023 Shirley Jackson Marathon Announces Lottery ‘Winners’ March 08, 2023/ Mark Remy Race director flooded with desperate protests.Read More
June 08, 2022 Running Through Cemetery Prompts Local Man to Ponder Ephemeral Nature of Human Existence and Also How Wild It Would Be If Zombies Emerged From Graves and Chased Him June 08, 2022/ Mark Remy Most corpses would look pretty gnarly by now, man concludes.Read More
February 14, 2022 Trail-Running Physician Advises Terminal Patient to 'Rub Some Dirt on It' February 14, 2022/ Mark Remy Woman questions proposed course of action.Read More
October 01, 2021 Dumb Runner Illustrated #27: 'Birthday' October 01, 2021/ Mark Remy One day closer to a new age group.Read More
July 19, 2021 Louisiana’s ‘Broken Bridge 10K’ Claims 39 More Victims July 19, 2021/ Mark Remy Weekend fatalities push event’s 25-year death toll past 1,000.Read More
September 02, 2020 Eulogy Glosses Over Runner’s Pathetic PRs September 02, 2020/ Mark Remy Also left unmentioned: Deceased’s numerous DNFs.Read More
