New Guidelines Recommend Staying 30 Feet Away from Bad Science, Sloppy Reporting
/
Quarantined Race Director Stays Sharp With Daily Starter Pistol Practice
/
Neighbors seem to love it, local man says.
Read MoreFamily on Sidewalk Forms Impenetrable Wall of Flesh
/
Mother, father, children walk five abreast, show no signs of yielding.
Read MoreIn Spirit of Goodwill, Motorist Gives Runner One Middle Finger Instead of Usual Two
/
Driver swept up in moment of compassion and empathy.
Read More‘Sure, That’s a Nice, Safe Distance,’ Says Report From National Academy of Sarcastic Public Health Experts
/
Group of wise-ass professionals calls social-distancing efforts “just perfect.”
Read MoreHigh-Fiving Runners Apparently Have Lost Their Goddamn Minds
/
Total lunatics treat skin-on-skin contact like it’s no big deal.
Read More
Local Runner Can’t Believe Race Canceled Just Because of Fast-Spreading Global Health Emergency For Which Nation Is Woefully Unprepared
/
“Oh come on!” says exasperated man.
Read MoreLocal Runner Bluffs Way Through 10-Minute Conversation on Olympic Marathon Trials
/
Man joins banter, masking ignorance of topic.
Read MoreWorld Health Organization Pivots to Treat Runners Affected by Tokyo Marathon Cancellation
/
Global health agency diverts funds, personnel to address new challenge.
Read MoreMcGillivray Cites ‘Can’t-Miss’ Dentist Appointment in Explaining New Date for 2020 Boston Marathon
/
Longtime race director regrets scheduling snafu.
Read MorePanicked Kipchoge Can’t Find His Vaporflys
/
“They’re super expensive!” says increasingly frantic world champion.
Read MoreAuto Industry Urges Congress to Raise Pedestrian Heights
/
Makers of trucks and SUVs point to spike in deaths, injuries.
Read MoreGuy You Just Met Doesn’t Even Like to Drive 26.2 Miles
/
Jokester amuses self, others with wry observation.
Read MoreNew Iowa Law Lets Runners Roll Through Stop Signs
/
Advocacy groups applaud “common sense” legislation.
Read MoreSurprisingly Well-Informed Motorist Screams at Runner to Get Off Road, Shorten Stride Length, Trade Jacket for Vest
/
Driver balances hostility with constructive criticism.
Read MoreBeach Runner Executes Flawless Grand Jeté Over Pile of Medical Waste
/
Washed-up detritus stands in contrast with moment of balletic grace.
Read MoreHow Was Your Year in Running? Answer These Questions and We'll Tell You!
/
Calculate your RunWorth™ score and you’ll know exactly where you stand.
Read MoreYear in Review: Dumb Runner’s 12 Most Popular Articles of 2019
/
Don’t ask me why, but you guys seemed to love these.
Read MoreSatan Pleased With Success of ‘Holiday Run’ Campaign
/
