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Mark Remy's DumbRunner.com

Satire You Can Trust, Since 2015

Running News from DumbRunner.com

Running news, running commentary, and running humor from DumbRunner.com, updated several times every week.

Mark Remy's DumbRunner.com
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November 08, 2021

NYC Marathon Finish Line Blocked by Tourists Looking for M&M’s Store

November 08, 2021/ Mark Remy
NYC Marathon Finish Line Blocked by Tourists Looking for M&M’s Store

Oblivious out-of-towners annoy hundreds.

Read More
November 08, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
New York City Marathon, Finish Line, Tourists, Annoyance
November 05, 2021

Dumb Runner Illustrated #30: Ghost

November 05, 2021/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #30: Ghost

Pre-race anxiety is no joke.

Read More
November 05, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Comics, Steve Prefontaine, Billy Crudup, Ghosts, Anxiety, Insomnia
November 03, 2021

Boston Marathon Says Runners in 2022 Must Be Vaccinated or Raise at Least $5,000 for Charity

November 03, 2021/ Mark Remy
Boston Marathon Says Runners in 2022 Must Be Vaccinated or Raise at Least $5,000 for Charity

Exemption rankles purists, delights vaccine holdouts.

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November 03, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Boston Marathon, Vaccines, COVID-19, Coronavirus, Marathons, Charity
November 01, 2021

Local Woman Running New York City Marathon to Raise Funds for New York City Marathon

November 01, 2021/ Mark Remy
Local Woman Running New York City Marathon to Raise Funds for New York City Marathon

Longtime runner says she’s doing this one “for something bigger.”

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November 01, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
New York City Marathon, Charity
October 27, 2021

Dumb Runner Illustrated #29: Run/Walk

October 27, 2021/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #29: Run/Walk

Break/enter.

Read More
October 27, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Comics, Run/walk, Galloway
October 25, 2021

Series of Friendly Greetings No Match for Runner’s Seriousness

October 25, 2021/ Mark Remy
Series of Friendly Greetings No Match for Runner’s Seriousness

Local man maintains laser-like focus despite warm gestures.

Read More
October 25, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Smile, Greetings, Human behavior
October 13, 2021

‘We Love Running—and Each Other,’ Say Local Couple, Nauseating Dozens

October 13, 2021/ Mark Remy
‘We Love Running—and Each Other,’ Say Local Couple, Nauseating Dozens

Authorities urge onlookers to avoid doting duo.

Read More
October 13, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Couple, Love, Nausea
October 11, 2021

EXCLUSIVE: Shalane Flanagan Using Body Doubles for 6-Marathons-in-6-Weeks Feat

October 11, 2021/ Mark Remy
EXCLUSIVE: Shalane Flanagan Using Body Doubles for 6-Marathons-in-6-Weeks Feat

Audacious quest is “bogus,” says anonymous whistleblower.

Read More
October 11, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Marathons, Shalane Flanagan, Body Doubles
October 09, 2021

What You Need to Know About the 2021 Boston Marathon, From a Guy Who Just Found Out His Girlfriend Has Been Cheating on Him

October 09, 2021/ Mark Remy
What You Need to Know About the 2021 Boston Marathon, From a Guy Who Just Found Out His Girlfriend Has Been Cheating on Him

“Ashley and Dan will probably sleep through all of those start times, in Ashley’s bed, since they’ll have been up all night doing it.”

Read More
October 09, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Boston Marathon, Cheating, Girlfriend
October 08, 2021

Dumb Runner Illustrated #28: 'Reflection'

October 08, 2021/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #28: 'Reflection'

“Seriously?”

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October 08, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Comics, Safety, Pedestrian safety, Motorists, Traffic
October 06, 2021

Barred From Kissing Boston Marathoners, Wellesley Students Will Instead Kiss Each Other, Playfully at First, According to Man’s Imagination

October 06, 2021/ Mark Remy
Barred From Kissing Boston Marathoners, Wellesley Students Will Instead Kiss Each Other, Playfully at First, According to Man’s Imagination

Tentative exploration will quickly lead to full-blown passion, straight male runner assumes.

Read More
October 06, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Boston Marathon, Wellesley, COVID-19, Coronavirus, Hot action
October 01, 2021

Dumb Runner Illustrated #27: 'Birthday'

October 01, 2021/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #27: 'Birthday'

One day closer to a new age group.

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October 01, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Comics, Death, Birthday, BQ, Age group awards
September 29, 2021

Local Woman Accidentally Clicks Link to LetsRun.com Message Board

September 29, 2021/ Mark Remy
Local Woman Accidentally Clicks Link to LetsRun.com Message Board

Victim is in stable condition.

Read More
September 29, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
LetsRun.com, Accidents, Eww
September 03, 2021

Dumb Runner Illustrated #25: 'Easy Does It'

September 03, 2021/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #25: 'Easy Does It'

Don’t do too much, too fast.

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September 03, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Comics, Kenya, Easy, Slow
September 01, 2021

Local Runner’s Wife Surprises Him With That New Knee He’s Had His Eye On

September 01, 2021/ Mark Remy
Local Runner’s Wife Surprises Him With That New Knee He’s Had His Eye On

Man delights in unexpected gift.

Read More
September 01, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Knees, Gifts for Runners, Surprise, Marriage
August 30, 2021

Boston Marathon Finish Line Volunteers Will Skip Traditional Open-Mouthed Kisses This Year, Organizers Say

August 30, 2021/ Mark Remy
Boston Marathon Finish Line Volunteers Will Skip Traditional Open-Mouthed Kisses This Year, Organizers Say

B.A.A. suspends longtime custom over COVID fears.

Read More
August 30, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Boston Marathon, COVID-19, Coronavirus, Medals, Kiss
August 16, 2021

Woman Who Just DNF’d Her First Marathon Figures She Has Nothing Left to Prove

August 16, 2021/ Mark Remy
Woman Who Just DNF’d Her First Marathon Figures She Has Nothing Left to Prove

Local runner crosses “attempt marathon” off her bucket list.

Read More
August 16, 2021/ Mark Remy/
Satire, News
Marathons, DNF, Quitting, Goals, Ice cream
August 04, 2021

Ironman Finisher Goes 5 Days Without Mentioning It, Shattering Previous Record

August 04, 2021/ Mark Remy
Ironman Finisher Goes 5 Days Without Mentioning It, Shattering Previous Record

Local man sets a high bar for fellow triathletes.

Read More
August 04, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Ironman, Triathlon, Talk, Shut up, Racing
July 30, 2021

Dumb Runner Illustrated #23: 'Dread'

July 30, 2021/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #23: 'Dread'

It’s funny ’cause it’s true.

Read More
July 30, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Comics, Treadmill, Dread, Running humor, Comedy, TWSS
July 28, 2021

Local Man Not Sure Whether Pain From Running or Just Being Old

July 28, 2021/ Mark Remy
Local Man Not Sure Whether Pain From Running or Just Being Old

Definitive answer remains elusive for longtime runner.

Read More
July 28, 2021/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Pain, Aging, Mysteries, Seniors
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    • Tees, Hoodies, Etc.
    • "Was It Fun? A Dumb Runner Comics Collection"
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Mark Remy's DumbRunner.com

DumbRunner.com is a website for runners who enjoy laughter and pie, from longtime writer and marathoner Mark Remy. Dumb Runner offers humor, insight, and 100% B.S.-free advice for runners of all abilities.

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