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Mark Remy's DumbRunner.com

Satire You Can Trust, Since 2015

Running News from DumbRunner.com

Running news, running commentary, and running humor from DumbRunner.com, updated several times every week.

Mark Remy's DumbRunner.com
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December 18, 2020

Dumb Runner Illustrated #7: 'Can You Hold It?'

December 18, 2020/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #7: 'Can You Hold It?'

You guessed it: One more in an occasional series.

Read More
December 18, 2020/ Mark Remy/
Satire, News
Comics, Poop
December 16, 2020

Local Web Designer Suffers Severe Reaction to LetsRun.com Homepage

December 16, 2020/ Mark Remy
Local Web Designer Suffers Severe Reaction to LetsRun.com Homepage

Victim may never fully recover aesthetic sensibilities, doctors say.

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December 16, 2020/ Mark Remy/
Satire, News
LetsRun.com, Aesthetic sensibilities, Web design, Information overload
December 14, 2020

Man Fears Tweet About His Morning Run Already Lost in Today’s 24/7 News Cycle

December 14, 2020/ Mark Remy
Man Fears Tweet About His Morning Run Already Lost in Today’s 24/7 News Cycle

Local runner contends with firehose of content.

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December 14, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Morning run, News, Social media, 24/7 news cycle
December 09, 2020

Nuun Calls Trials of Vaccine-Flavored Tablets 'Very Promising'

December 09, 2020/ Mark Remy
Nuun Calls Trials of Vaccine-Flavored Tablets 'Very Promising'

Company says first doses could be ready in months.

Read More
December 09, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Nutrition, Satire
Nuun, Coronavirus, COVID-19, Fizzy color, Science, Hydration, Marketing
December 04, 2020

Dumb Runner Illustrated #6: 'Bike Lane'

December 04, 2020/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #6: 'Bike Lane'

One more in an occasional series.

Read More
December 04, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Comics, Bikes, Little girls, Potty mouty
November 23, 2020

High-Stakes Gambler Goes for Morning Run Without Pooping First

November 23, 2020/ Mark Remy
High-Stakes Gambler Goes for Morning Run Without Pooping First

“I live life on the edge,” says local runner.

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November 23, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Poop, Gambling, Morning run
November 20, 2020

Last-Minute Entrant Excited for 58th Annual JFK 50 Mile

November 20, 2020/ Mark Remy
Last-Minute Entrant Excited for 58th Annual JFK 50 Mile

“I love big events,” says bespectacled competitor.

Read More
November 20, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Real
Ultras, COVID-19, Coronavirus, Clumsy disguise, Not funny
November 20, 2020

Dumb Runner Illustrated #5: 'Marathon PR'

November 20, 2020/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #5: 'Marathon PR'

Yet another in an occasional series.


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November 20, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Marathons, PR, Rules, Comics
November 18, 2020

Longtime Friends Don't Let Political Differences Interfere With Their Running, Because They Haven't Spoken in 18 Months

November 18, 2020/ Mark Remy
Longtime Friends Don't Let Political Differences Interfere With Their Running, Because They Haven't Spoken in 18 Months

“It’s really worked out well,” says local woman.

Read More
November 18, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Politics, Friends, Running buddy
November 16, 2020

Runner’s Roommate Could Do Marathon If She Really Wanted To

November 16, 2020/ Mark Remy
Runner’s Roommate Could Do Marathon If She Really Wanted To

“All you need to do is just keep going, right?” muses local woman.

Read More
November 16, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Marathons, Desire, Motivation, Roommate, Chutzpah
November 09, 2020

No One Sure If Guy Running in Rain Is Tough or Just Dumb

November 09, 2020/ Mark Remy
No One Sure If Guy Running in Rain Is Tough or Just Dumb

Opinions vary among local residents.

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November 09, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Training, Satire
Rain, Bad weather, Dumb, Tough
November 06, 2020

Dumb Runner Illustrated #4: 'Urgent Text'

November 06, 2020/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #4: 'Urgent Text'

Another in an occasional series.

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November 06, 2020/ Mark Remy/
Satire, News
Comics, Phone, Text messages
November 03, 2020

Friends Arrange to Meet for Post-Election 5-Miler, Unless Powder Keg of Hyperpartisan Rage Explodes, Sparking Orgy of Violence, in Which Case They’ll Postpone

November 03, 2020/ Mark Remy
Friends Arrange to Meet for Post-Election 5-Miler, Unless Powder Keg of Hyperpartisan Rage Explodes, Sparking Orgy of Violence, in Which Case They’ll Postpone

Running partners will make “game-day decision.”

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November 03, 2020/ Mark Remy/
Real, News
Politics, Powder keg, Running partner
November 02, 2020

‘Paid Posts on Your Website’: A Story in 8 Screenshots (and Counting)

November 02, 2020/ Mark Remy
‘Paid Posts on Your Website’: A Story in 8 Screenshots (and Counting)

Oh, I’m interested, all right.

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November 02, 2020/ Mark Remy/
Real, News
Paid posts, Ad free, Affiliate links, Unsolicited offers, Bullshit
October 29, 2020

Guy Dressed as Canadian Marathoner Reid Coolsaet Annoyed That No One Gets His Costume

October 29, 2020/ Mark Remy
Guy Dressed as Canadian Marathoner Reid Coolsaet Annoyed That No One Gets His Costume

“Who else could I be?” asks exasperated transplant.

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October 29, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Canada, Halloween, Reid Coolsaet, Costumes, Annoyance
October 28, 2020

Report: Snake!

October 28, 2020/ Mark Remy
Report: Snake!

Trail runner notices, reacts to reptile.

Read More
October 28, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News
Trail running, Snakes, Herpetology
October 23, 2020

Dumb Runner Illustrated #3: 'New Shoes'

October 23, 2020/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #3: 'New Shoes'

Third in an occasional series.

Read More
October 23, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Comics, Shoes
October 21, 2020

Guy Who Just Took Up Running Still Has That New Runner Smell

October 21, 2020/ Mark Remy
Guy Who Just Took Up Running Still Has That New Runner Smell

Intoxicating scent attracts others.

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October 21, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
New runners, Smell
October 19, 2020

Trail Runner Records Terrifying 6-Minute Encounter With Brand Ambassador

October 19, 2020/ Mark Remy
Trail Runner Records Terrifying 6-Minute Encounter With Brand Ambassador

Man escapes “chilling” wilderness experience.

Read More
October 19, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Trail running, Terror, Brand ambassador, Nuun, Promo code
October 09, 2020

Dumb Runner Illustrated #2: 'Maybe There's an App'

October 09, 2020/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #2: 'Maybe There's an App'

Second in an occasional series.

Read More
October 09, 2020/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire, Training
Comics, Training
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Mark Remy's DumbRunner.com

DumbRunner.com is a website for runners who enjoy laughter and pie, from longtime writer and marathoner Mark Remy. Dumb Runner offers humor, insight, and 100% B.S.-free advice for runners of all abilities.

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