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Mark Remy's DumbRunner.com

Satire You Can Trust, Since 2015

Running News from DumbRunner.com

Running news, running commentary, and running humor from DumbRunner.com, updated several times every week.

Mark Remy's DumbRunner.com
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April 08, 2016

This Insane Demon Fish Is the One You See on the Beach Runs of Your Nightmares

April 08, 2016/ Mark Remy

As if I needed another reason to avoid running on sand. 

Read More
April 08, 2016/ Mark Remy/
News
Real, Beach running, Lancetfish, Devil fish, Oregon
April 04, 2016

The Last Satirical Guidebook to Runners You Will Ever Need

April 04, 2016/ Mark Remy
The Last Satirical Guidebook to Runners You Will Ever Need

Read an excerpt from Runners of North America, the perfect book for anyone hoping to understand these exotic creatures.

Read More
April 04, 2016/ Mark Remy/
News, Motivation
Runners of North America, Gifts, Books, Species, Gifts for Runners
April 04, 2016

Housewife Make Joke With Jogger Stick

April 04, 2016/ Mark Remy
Housewife Make Joke With Jogger Stick

Jogger stick build like fun, but not.

Read More
April 04, 2016/ Mark Remy/
News
Stock photos, Jogging, Jogger stick, Mops
April 01, 2016

NRA Calls For Live Ammo in Starter Pistols

April 01, 2016/ Mark Remy
NRA Calls For Live Ammo in Starter Pistols

Proposal from gun rights group meets with universal praise.

Read More
April 01, 2016/ Mark Remy/
Satire
Guns, NRA, Track meets
March 18, 2016

Studies Show Music Can Boost Your Running, Right Up to the Moment You're Struck by a Car That You Couldn't Hear

March 18, 2016/ Mark Remy
Studies Show Music Can Boost Your Running, Right Up to the Moment You're Struck by a Car That You Couldn't Hear

Anecdotal evidence appears to back this up.

Read More
March 18, 2016/ Mark Remy/
Satire, News, Motivation
Headphones, Motivation, iPod, Running with music
March 08, 2016

Ask Dr. Dumb: Did Nike Bribe Kenyan Officials?

March 08, 2016/ Mark Remy
Ask Dr. Dumb: Did Nike Bribe Kenyan Officials?

A $500,000 "commitment bonus" raises eyebrows. (Not ours, Nike lawyers! Ha ha!)

Read More
March 08, 2016/ Mark Remy/
News
Nike, Dr. Dumb, Kenya, Bribe
March 01, 2016

NRA Tweets to Runners, Shoots Self in Foot

March 01, 2016/ Mark Remy
NRA Tweets to Runners, Shoots Self in Foot

They didn't exactly get the responses they were hoping for.

Read More
March 01, 2016/ Mark Remy/
News
Guns, NRA, Twitter, Fear
February 25, 2016

What the 'Portlandia' Marathon Got Wrong

February 25, 2016/ Mark Remy
What the 'Portlandia' Marathon Got Wrong

Sorry, but someone had to say this.

Read More
February 25, 2016/ Mark Remy/
News
Portlandia, Marathons, Fred Armisen, Carrie Brownstein, Racing
February 23, 2016

Kitten Runs Marathon to Raise Awareness of Own Cuteness

February 23, 2016/ Mark Remy
Kitten Runs Marathon to Raise Awareness of Own Cuteness

"Oh my God," say runners, staff, and spectators. "That is so cute."

Read More
February 23, 2016/ Mark Remy/
Satire
Racing, Cats, Kittens, Cuteness, Marathons
February 18, 2016

The Ugly Side of 'Nice Guy' Meb Keflezighi

February 18, 2016/ Mark Remy
The Ugly Side of 'Nice Guy' Meb Keflezighi

He was not kind, recalls a former Blockbuster employee.

Read More
February 18, 2016/ Mark Remy/
Satire, News
Meb Keflezighi, Elite runners, Nice
February 16, 2016

Comedic Genius Runs 'Only When Chased'

February 16, 2016/ Mark Remy
Comedic Genius Runs 'Only When Chased'

Columbus, Ohio, sales rep never stops cracking up friends and coworkers.

Read More
February 16, 2016/ Mark Remy/
Satire
Racing, Marathons, Comedy
February 09, 2016

9 Worst Valentine's Day Gifts for Runners

February 09, 2016/ Mark Remy
9 Worst Valentine's Day Gifts for Runners

Don't waste good money on bad gifts like these.

Read More
February 09, 2016/ Mark Remy/
February 04, 2016

Running With Your Gun: FAQ

February 04, 2016/ Mark Remy
Running With Your Gun: FAQ

How to ensure accidents don't happen? With education, that's how.

Read More
February 04, 2016/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire, Gear
Guns
February 04, 2016

9 Fun Simpsons Moments for Runners

February 04, 2016/ Mark Remy
9 Fun Simpsons Moments for Runners

Thank you, Frinkiac.com!

Read More
February 04, 2016/ Mark Remy/
February 02, 2016

Quiz: Are You a Good Runner?

February 02, 2016/ Mark Remy
Quiz: Are You a Good Runner?

Or are you just awful? Answer a few questions and find out.

Read More
February 02, 2016/ Mark Remy/
News
Badwater 135, Character, Quiz
January 26, 2016

Sanders, Trump Agree to 'Runoff' in Iowa

January 26, 2016/ Mark Remy
Sanders, Trump Agree to 'Runoff' in Iowa

With caucuses less than a week away, another race looms.

Read More
January 26, 2016/ Mark Remy/
Satire, News
Donald Trump, Bernie Sanders, 2016 election, Politics
January 18, 2016

Farewell Ryan Hall, the Martin Riggs of Road Racing

January 18, 2016/ Mark Remy
Farewell Ryan Hall, the Martin Riggs of Road Racing

Only now that he's retiring do I fully grasp the essence of Ryan Hall's appeal.

Read More
January 18, 2016/ Mark Remy/
News
Ryan Hall, Lethal Weapon, Martin Riggs, Retirement
January 12, 2016

If I Win the Powerball Jackpot, I Will Register for a Rock 'n' Roll Race

January 12, 2016/ Mark Remy
If I Win the Powerball Jackpot, I Will Register for a Rock 'n' Roll Race

Extravagant? Ostentatious? A vulgar display of obscene wealth? Perhaps. I don't care.

Read More
January 12, 2016/ Mark Remy/
Satire, News
Racing, Rock 'n' Roll Marathon, Entry fees, Powerball
January 08, 2016

7 Bits of Advice From a Runner, for Mark Zuckerberg

January 08, 2016/ Mark Remy
7 Bits of Advice From a Runner, for Mark Zuckerberg

As Facebook's CEO launches his Year of Running, we have a few suggestions.

Read More
January 08, 2016/ Mark Remy/
News
Mark Zuckerberg, Facebook, Year of Running
January 06, 2016

Watch a Kenyan Trip Over a Dog in Japan

January 06, 2016/ Mark Remy
Watch a Kenyan Trip Over a Dog in Japan

As is so often the case, this story raises more questions than it answers.

Read More
January 06, 2016/ Mark Remy/
News
Ekiden, Dogs, Japan, Simpsons
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    • NEW BOOK! "The Running Dictionary"
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Mark Remy's DumbRunner.com

DumbRunner.com is a website for runners who enjoy laughter and pie, from longtime writer and marathoner Mark Remy. Dumb Runner offers humor, insight, and 100% B.S.-free advice for runners of all abilities.

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