7 Bits of Advice From a Runner, for Mark Zuckerberg

Mark Zuckerberg, Facebook

Mark Zuckerberg, Facebook

When Facebook founder and CEO Mark Zuckerberg announced Monday that he intended to run 365 miles in 2016—what he's calling a Year of Running—and invited the world to join him, it caused quite a stir. Everyone from People magazine to Runner's World sat up and noticed, and Facebook lit up with reactions from every corner of the globe.

We at Dumb Runner applaud Mr. Zuckerberg's initiative to inspire more people to run. And, although we know he has already been inundated with advice from "experts" and lay people alike, we have a few suggestions for him ourselves. 

1. Dump Facebook Messenger. I don’t want or need another app on my phone. Reading private messages on my phone the old way was perfectly fine. Whose idea was this anyway?

2. Let people show women’s nipples in photographs. Breasts are perfectly natural—not something to be ashamed of!

3. Hurry up with that Dislike button. It’s long overdue.

4. Think of a way to block not just people but certain kinds of posts from certain people. Like, maybe I have an uncle who goes off on crazy political rants. I should be able to block just his crazy political posts—not all of his posts.

5. Get rid of the Poke feature. No one understands what it’s for. I suspect even you don’t. Those few times I've been "Poked" on Facebook, it's just been weird and confusing.

6. Invest in some good socks. You’d be amazed what a difference good socks can make.

7. Share the wealth. I know that “$4.5 million” giveaway thing was a hoax, but you should think about really doing that. You have so much money, you wouldn’t even miss it!

Good luck this year, Mr. Zuckerberg. We hope you will take our advice to heart.