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Mark Remy's DumbRunner.com

Satire You Can Trust, Since 2015

Running News from DumbRunner.com

Running news, running commentary, and running humor from DumbRunner.com, updated several times every week.

Mark Remy's DumbRunner.com
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July 24, 2025

Dumb Runner Illustrated #133: 'List'

July 24, 2025/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #133: 'List'

Check, check, check.

Read More
July 24, 2025/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Comics, Travel, Destination race, Checklist
July 23, 2025

Local Runner Skips 8-Page ‘Runner’s World’ Article Because Frankly It Seems Like a Real Downer

July 23, 2025/ Mark Remy
Local Runner Skips 8-Page ‘Runner’s World’ Article Because Frankly It Seems Like a Real Downer

“Ugh,” says reader.

Read More
July 23, 2025/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Runner's World, Downer, Media
July 21, 2025

Badwater Finishers Furious to Learn Course Was 63 Miles Short

July 21, 2025/ Mark Remy
Badwater Finishers Furious to Learn Course Was 63 Miles Short

Organizers blame error on volunteer course marshal.

Read More
July 21, 2025/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Course records, Badwater 135, Furor, Mistakes
July 11, 2025

Dumb Runner Illustrated #132: 'Footprints'

July 11, 2025/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #132: 'Footprints'

Hey, He’s only human. Or was. Depending on whom you ask.

Read More
July 11, 2025/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Footprints, Religion, Jesus, DNF, Comics
July 09, 2025

Holy Shit, Get a Load of This Guy’s Legs, Experts Say

July 09, 2025/ Mark Remy
Holy Shit, Get a Load of This Guy’s Legs, Experts Say

“Wow,” agree academics and scientists.

Read More
July 09, 2025/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Holy shit, Legs, Muscles, Experts
July 07, 2025

Cult Members Wear Strange Clothing, Ingest Weird Foods, Endure Painful Rituals

July 07, 2025/ Mark Remy
Cult Members Wear Strange Clothing, Ingest Weird Foods, Endure Painful Rituals

Authorities say sect has members worldwide.

Read More
July 07, 2025/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Cult, Weird, Pain, Rituals
July 02, 2025

Runner Complaining About Summer Weather Can’t Wait to Start Complaining About Winter Weather

July 02, 2025/ Mark Remy
Runner Complaining About Summer Weather Can’t Wait to Start Complaining About Winter Weather

Local man eager to switch things up.

Read More
July 02, 2025/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Summer, Winter, Complaints, Bad weather
June 25, 2025

Report: Great, These Assholes Again

June 25, 2025/ Mark Remy
Report: Great, These Assholes Again

Local runner wonders what their deal is, anyway.

Read More
June 25, 2025/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Track, Assholes, Couple, Etiquette, Annoyance
June 23, 2025

‘Any Advice?’ Runner With Compound Fracture Asks Facebook Running Group

June 23, 2025/ Mark Remy
‘Any Advice?’ Runner With Compound Fracture Asks Facebook Running Group

Fellow runners suggest stretches, dietary supplements, new shoes.

Read More
June 23, 2025/ Mark Remy/
June 20, 2025

Dumb Runner Illustrated #131: 'Storytime'

June 20, 2025/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #131: 'Storytime'

Only 350 pages to go!

Read More
June 20, 2025/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Comics, Jack Daniels, Boo, Storytime, Children
June 18, 2025

Headphone-Wearing Runner’s Off-Leash Dog Also Wearing Headphones

June 18, 2025/ Mark Remy
Headphone-Wearing Runner’s Off-Leash Dog Also Wearing Headphones

Both creatures unaware of surroundings.

Read More
June 18, 2025/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Dogs, Trail, Headphones, Running with music, Etiquette, Obliviousness
June 16, 2025

OUTRAGE ALERT! This Member of the Slow AF Running Club Is Not Slow as Fuck

June 16, 2025/ Mark Remy
OUTRAGE ALERT! This Member of the Slow AF Running Club Is Not Slow as Fuck

Investigation reveals 5K PR of 24:33.

Read More
June 16, 2025/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Slow, Fuck, Running club, Impostor, Fraud
June 11, 2025

Ask Dr. Dumb: Should I Worry About Really Muscly Kangaroos?

June 11, 2025/ Mark Remy
Ask Dr. Dumb: Should I Worry About Really Muscly Kangaroos?

Yes, and doubly so if you’re near a body of water.

Read More
June 11, 2025/ Mark Remy/
Australia, Kangaroos, Dr. Dumb, Bodies of water
June 05, 2025

Dumb Runner Illustrated #130: 'Why'

June 05, 2025/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #130: 'Why'

“Well …”

Read More
June 05, 2025/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Comics, Marathons, Why, Good questions
June 04, 2025

Local Runner Works Story of Shitting Self in Marathon Into Yet Another Conversation

June 04, 2025/ Mark Remy
Local Runner Works Story of Shitting Self in Marathon Into Yet Another Conversation

New coworker taken aback.

Read More
June 04, 2025/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Marathons, Shitting oneself, Chitchat, Guy you work with
May 28, 2025

OPINION: Stop Shaming Newbies Who Don't Know What ‘5’ Means, or How Numerals Work in General

May 28, 2025/ Mark Remy
OPINION: Stop Shaming Newbies Who Don't Know What ‘5’ Means, or How Numerals Work in General

Do better, gatekeepers.

Read More
May 28, 2025/ Mark Remy/
New runners, Marathons, Rodents
May 22, 2025

Dumb Runner Illustrated #129: 'Recovery'

May 22, 2025/ Mark Remy
Dumb Runner Illustrated #129: 'Recovery'

Take a hike, Brian—and then recover from that hike!

Read More
May 22, 2025/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Recovery, Marketing, Ma, Brian, Comics
May 21, 2025

Local Runner Grateful for Little Wave From Motorist Who Nearly Hit Her

May 21, 2025/ Mark Remy
Local Runner Grateful for Little Wave From Motorist Who Nearly Hit Her

Woman appreciates feeble gesture.

Read More
May 21, 2025/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Pedestrian safety, Motorists, Distraction, Smartphone
May 19, 2025

American Runner Bound for Canada Happy About Favorable Mile/Kilometer Exchange Rate

May 19, 2025/ Mark Remy
American Runner Bound for Canada Happy About Favorable Mile/Kilometer Exchange Rate

Local man intends to “load up on long runs” during visit.

Read More
May 19, 2025/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Canada, Metric system, Exchange rate, Travel
May 14, 2025

Runner Has Ironman Calf Tattoo of Runner With Ironman Calf Tattoo

May 14, 2025/ Mark Remy
Runner Has Ironman Calf Tattoo of Runner With Ironman Calf Tattoo

Meta image shared on Meta social media platforms.

Read More
May 14, 2025/ Mark Remy/
News, Satire
Tattoos, Ironman, Irony
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  • Running 101/
  • SHOP/
    • Tees, Hoodies, Etc.
    • "Was It Fun? A Dumb Runner Comics Collection"
    • "C is for Chafing" picture book
    • "The Runner's Rule Book"
  • Support Dumb Runner/
  • INFO/
    • What Is Dumb Runner?
    • Who Is Dumb Runner?
    • Contact
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Mark Remy's DumbRunner.com

DumbRunner.com is a website for runners who enjoy laughter and pie, from longtime writer and marathoner Mark Remy. Dumb Runner offers humor, insight, and 100% B.S.-free advice for runners of all abilities.

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