Tracksmith Gets ‘Intimate’ With Handcrafted Anal Beads
/
Poser in HOKA T-Shirt Probably Can’t Even Name Three HOKA Models
/
Local runner scoffs at hipster's fashion choice.
Read MoreBeginning Runner Not Yet Confident Enough to Try It Without Floaties
/
Local woman still nervous.
Read MoreRunner Who Just Got $55 Tracksmith Hat Not Much Happier Than He Was Before He Got $55 Tracksmith Hat
/
Limited-edition item barely moves the needle on man’s mood.
Read More‘Nice Socks Are an Affordable Luxury,’ Says Runner Who Owns $437 Worth of Nice Socks
/
“You can always use another pair of socks,” woman adds.
Read MoreNike Offers Sneak Peek at USATF Uniform for 2028 Olympics
/
Photos depict model in various positions.
Read MoreIn Hilarious April Fool's Prank, Running Shoe Makers Pledge to Move Factories From Asia to U.S.
/
“Ha ha!” says consortium of gear manufacturers.
Read MoreConsumer Watchdogs Accuse Nike of 'Shrinkflation'
/
Critics say footwear giant is giving runners less shoe for same price.
Read MoreNew Boston Marathon Jackets Will Expire After 10 Years, B.A.A. Says, Because ‘Come On, You Ran the Thing 10 Years Ago’
/
Fabric will be engineered to disintegrate after a decade.
Read More‘At Least My Shoes Are Super,’ Sad Runner Tells Self
/
Carbon-plated footwear provides shining light in world of darkness.
Read MoreTracksmith Unveils ‘Back When Fat, Slow People Didn’t Run’-Scented Candle
/
Smell conjures nostalgia for a thinner, faster era, brand says.
Read MoreBreaking: Dad Just Bought a Pair of On Running Shoes
/
Patriarch thinks footwear looks “sharp.”
Read MoreNobel Prize for Marketing Awarded to Guy Who Got Everyone to Buy Those Walking Pole Things
/
Brand manager lauded for making obscure hiking aids ubiquitous.
Read MoreNation’s Race Directors Celebrate Giveaway of 10 Billionth Branded Bottle Opener
/
Group says it’s looking forward to “the next 10 billion.”
Read MorePink-Clad Stranger Tells Wearer of Carbon-Plated Shoes That She’s Always Had the Power to Go Fast
/
Wand-wielding woman delivers surprising insight.
Read MoreFormer Gillette Exec Proposes Running Shoe With 5 Carbon Plates
/
New Nike hire delivers on promise of fresh ideas.
Read MoreAdidas Unveils First Ever Boston Marathon 'DNF' Jacket
/
Runners who can’t finish famously tough course will get their own design.
Read More‘Sure, We’ll RECYCLE Your Old Shoes,’ Running Store Employee Assures Customer
/
Environmentally minded man leaves store feeling virtuous.
Read MoreRunner Marks 18th Birthday With Visit to Local Running Store’s ‘Adult’ Section
/
Depositphotos photo composite
A local runner celebrated his 18th birthday yesterday by visiting the “adults only” room of a nearby running store, Dumb Runner has learned—a milestone he’d been eagerly awaiting for years.
Vince Furnier, a high school senior and cross country team co-captain, called the experience at Runner's Zone, his longtime local running store, “cool, but honestly just a little bit of a letdown.”
“I grew up with the internet and everything,” Furnier explained. “So most of what I saw in there was stuff I already knew about.”
Still, he said, just being able to walk through the door of the restricted area was a thrill.
“I’d been dying to go in there for so long, just because it’s, like, forbidden fruit, you know?” he said. “So it was awesome to stroll in (to the store), flash my driver’s license to Brian, the manager, and get the key to the Adults Only room.”
Furnier spent about 10 minutes in the windowless room, he said, before leaving. Asked what exactly he saw or did during that time, Furnier hesitated.
“Let’s just say, I can understand why they keep kids out of there,” he said. “For sure.”
Tracksmith Recalls 1,200 Tops, Citing Dangerous Levels of Heritage
/
