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June 24, 2019

Institute for Juvenile Humor Launches ‘Boner-Conducting Headphone’ Project

June 24, 2019/ Mark Remy
Institute for Juvenile Humor Launches ‘Boner-Conducting Headphone’ Project

An unlikely group plans to enter tight market.

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June 24, 2019/ Mark Remy/
Gear
New gear, Headphones, Tumescence, Electronics
May 10, 2019

Get Dumb Runner's FREE Shoe Size Tool!

May 10, 2019/ Mark Remy
Get Dumb Runner's FREE Shoe Size Tool!

Not sure what size you need? You aren’t alone.

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May 10, 2019/ Mark Remy/
Gear, Satire
Running shoes, Shoe size, Tools, Let Me Google That For You, 2D printing
May 06, 2019

'What If We Made a Whole Marathon Course Out of Foam?' Asks Totally Stoned Running Shoe Designer

May 06, 2019/ Mark Remy
'What If We Made a Whole Marathon Course Out of Foam?' Asks Totally Stoned Running Shoe Designer

Weekend cannabis session yields a mind-blowing idea.

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May 06, 2019/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Cannabis, Marijuana, Carbon fiber, Running shoes, Innovation, Totally stoned
May 01, 2019

BOB Rolls Out New Line of Budget Jogging Strollers

May 01, 2019/ Mark Remy
BOB Rolls Out New Line of Budget Jogging Strollers

Aimed at value-minded customers, “BOB Basics” models start at $49.

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May 01, 2019/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
BOB, Jogging strollers, Budget, No frills
April 22, 2019

Blogger's Integrity Surprisingly Affordable, Brand Discovers

April 22, 2019/ Mark Remy
Blogger's Integrity Surprisingly Affordable, Brand Discovers

Free product yields a bounty of uncritical coverage.

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April 22, 2019/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Ethics, Integrity, Gear, New gear, Media
February 11, 2019

Thrash Metal Expert Advises Winter Runners to Dress in Slayers

February 11, 2019/ Mark Remy
Thrash Metal Expert Advises Winter Runners to Dress in Slayers

“It’s like armor against wind chill, if Satan wore armor.”

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February 11, 2019/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Cold weather, Winter, Slayer, Thrash metal, Experts, Gear, Activewear
December 17, 2018

2019 Boston Marathon Fancy Hat Unveiled

December 17, 2018/ Mark Remy
2019 Boston Marathon Fancy Hat Unveiled

For next year’s race, commemorative fancy headwear is teal with white accents.

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December 17, 2018/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Boston Marathon, Fancy Hat, Official merchandise
November 21, 2018

ASICS Unveils New 'Nike' Model

November 21, 2018/ Mark Remy
ASICS Unveils New 'Nike' Model

With GEL-NIKE, brand hopes to boost stagnant sales.

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November 21, 2018/ Mark Remy/
Gear, Satire
ASICS, Nike, Running shoes
October 29, 2018

Kaepernick Boycott Forces Nike Into Bankruptcy

October 29, 2018/ Mark Remy
Kaepernick Boycott Forces Nike Into Bankruptcy

Apparel and footwear giant pays steep price for hot-button ad campaign.

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October 29, 2018/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Kaepernick, Nike, Bankruptcy, Boycott
September 06, 2018

Nike Boycott Not Retroactive, Decides Guy Who Dropped $250 on Zoom Vaporflys Last Week

September 06, 2018/ Mark Remy
Nike Boycott Not Retroactive, Decides Guy Who Dropped $250 on Zoom Vaporflys Last Week

“I mean, let’s not be rash,” says self-described patriot.

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September 06, 2018/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Nike, Boycott, Kneeling, Protest, Rationalization
September 03, 2018

Man's Running Shoes Expire in Middle of 5K

September 03, 2018/ Mark Remy
Man's Running Shoes Expire in Middle of 5K

Experts underscore need to replace shoes every 350 miles.

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September 03, 2018/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Running shoes, Gear
August 13, 2018

Asics Urges Runners to Replace Shoes by End of 3rd Fiscal Quarter

August 13, 2018/ Mark Remy
Asics Urges Runners to Replace Shoes by End of 3rd Fiscal Quarter

Company’s exhortation comes after a steep loss in Q2.

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August 13, 2018/ Mark Remy/
Gear, Satire
ASICS, Running shoes, Falling profits
July 16, 2018

Crazy Daredevil Uses Road Shoes on Trail Run

July 16, 2018/ Mark Remy
Crazy Daredevil Uses Road Shoes on Trail Run

Industry experts express horror at woman’s reckless behavior.

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July 16, 2018/ Mark Remy/
Gear, Satire
Trail run, Running shoes, Daredevil
July 01, 2018

Man Can't Tell If New HOKA Shoe Real or Joke

July 01, 2018/ Mark Remy
Man Can't Tell If New HOKA Shoe Real or Joke

“Ha ha,” says running store customer. “Um…”

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July 01, 2018/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Running shoes, HOKA, Foam, New
June 25, 2018

Runner Fails to Rock Outfit

June 25, 2018/ Mark Remy
Runner Fails to Rock Outfit

“Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever rock anything,” says distraught woman.

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June 25, 2018/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Rock, Outfit
May 21, 2018

Half-Price Shoes Feel Fine, Woman Convinces Self

May 21, 2018/ Mark Remy
Half-Price Shoes Feel Fine, Woman Convinces Self

Deeply discounted footwear is nonreturnable.

Read More
May 21, 2018/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Running shoes, Fit, Sale, Delusion
March 25, 2018

NipGuards Introduces NipGuards XL for Men With Huge Nipples

March 25, 2018/ Mark Remy
NipGuards Introduces NipGuards XL for Men With Huge Nipples

Line extension is just one of several to come, company says.

Read More
March 25, 2018/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Nipples, Chafing, Bloody, Product differentiation, XL
March 05, 2018

Nike Will Stop Selling React™ Foam-Equipped AR-15

March 05, 2018/ Mark Remy
Nike Will Stop Selling React™ Foam-Equipped AR-15

Sportswear giant joins other companies in distancing self from guns.

Read More
March 05, 2018/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Guns, Nike, AR-15
February 21, 2018

New Running Shoe Has Kind of Foam Totally Different From Other Kinds of Foam

February 21, 2018/ Mark Remy
New Running Shoe Has Kind of Foam Totally Different From Other Kinds of Foam

Is Carom GeniusBlast FluidFoam a game changer? Yes.

Read More
February 21, 2018/ Mark Remy/
Gear, Satire
Running shoes, Foam, Product differentiation, New gear
January 17, 2018

Nation's Runners Demand More Products They Can Buy

January 17, 2018/ Mark Remy
Nation's Runners Demand More Products They Can Buy

"Running enthusiasts are fed up" with lack of variety, says group's spokeswoman.

Read More
January 17, 2018/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
New gear, Gear, Running shoes, Running gear, Demands
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Mark Remy's DumbRunner.com

DumbRunner.com is a website for runners who enjoy laughter and pie, from longtime writer and marathoner Mark Remy. Dumb Runner offers humor, insight, and 100% B.S.-free advice for runners of all abilities.

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