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May 26, 2020

Editorial Wizard Transforms Ad Into Article With Addition of Byline

May 26, 2020/ Mark Remy
Editorial Wizard Transforms Ad Into Article With Addition of Byline

Modern-day sorcerer conjures up appearance of objectivity with a few keystrokes.

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May 26, 2020/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Ads, Running gear, Editorial inegrity, Wizardry, Alchemy, Ethics
March 31, 2020

New Nike ZoomX Vapormask 4% Faster Than Other Face Masks

March 31, 2020/ Mark Remy
New Nike ZoomX Vapormask 4% Faster Than Other Face Masks

Company calls newest innovation a game-changer.

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March 31, 2020/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Nike, Covid 19, Coronavirus, Face mask, Vaporfly
March 25, 2020

Shoes Break In New Runner

March 25, 2020/ Mark Remy
Shoes Break In New Runner

For local man, period of adjustment is off to a painful start.

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March 25, 2020/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
New gear, Running shoes, Shoes, Breaking in
March 02, 2020

Saucony Cancels Update of Covid 18 Shoe

March 02, 2020/ Mark Remy
Saucony Cancels Update of Covid 18 Shoe

Current version “cannot be improved upon,” shoemaker abruptly decides.

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March 02, 2020/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Public health, Saucony, Covid 19, Updates, Shoes
February 12, 2020

Compression Gear the Closest Local Runner Ever Gets to Being Hugged

February 12, 2020/ Mark Remy
Compression Gear the Closest Local Runner Ever Gets to Being Hugged

Lonely man finds solace in tight-fitting apparel.

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February 12, 2020/ Mark Remy/
Gear, Satire
Compression gear, Loneliness, Hugs, Running gear
February 10, 2020

‘Gear Makers Have Always Embraced Innovation,’ Adidas Rep Says of New Enchanted Shoe That Grants Wearer the Power of Flight

February 10, 2020/ Mark Remy
 ‘Gear Makers Have Always Embraced Innovation,’ Adidas Rep Says of New Enchanted Shoe That Grants Wearer the Power of Flight

Pixie Flyte gives runners unfair advantage, critics say.

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February 10, 2020/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Nike, Vaporfly, Innovation, Flight, Disingenuous arguments
January 29, 2020

Baggy Shorts Conceal Penis, Scrotum

January 29, 2020/ Mark Remy
Baggy Shorts Conceal Penis, Scrotum

Man uses sartorial sleight of hand to hide bulge.

Read More
January 29, 2020/ Mark Remy/
Gear
Tights, Penis, Scrotum, Baggy shorts, Sleight of hand
January 16, 2020

Nike Exec: Vaporfly Shoes ‘Totally Fair, Assuming Everyone Else Is Also Wearing Vaporfly Shoes’

January 16, 2020/ Mark Remy
Nike Exec: Vaporfly Shoes ‘Totally Fair, Assuming Everyone Else Is Also Wearing Vaporfly Shoes’

Company rep says universal adoption will level playing field.

Read More
January 16, 2020/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Nike, Vaporfly, Technology run amok, Eliud Kipchoge, Shoes, Fairness
December 16, 2019

Running Store Has This One Weird Brand of Shoe You’ve Never Heard of Before

December 16, 2019/ Mark Remy
Running Store Has This One Weird Brand of Shoe You’ve Never Heard of Before

Customers speculate on product’s country of origin.

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December 16, 2019/ Mark Remy/
Gear, Satire
Running shoes, Weird, Specialty running stores, Brands
November 29, 2019

The 2019 Dumb Runner Holiday Gift Guide

November 29, 2019/ Mark Remy
The 2019 Dumb Runner Holiday Gift Guide

Nine unique ideas for the fun-loving runner on your list, from just $5.

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November 29, 2019/ Mark Remy/
Gifts, Gear
Gift for runners, Holiday gifts, Gift guide, Books
November 05, 2019

Critics Say New Balance 'DAD/&' Shoe Gives Some Middle-Aged Fathers Unfair Advantage

November 05, 2019/ Mark Remy
Critics Say New Balance 'DAD/&' Shoe Gives Some Middle-Aged Fathers Unfair Advantage

Amp™ technology boosts “dad task” performance—for a price.

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November 05, 2019/ Mark Remy/
Gear, Satire
Running shoes, Nike, New Balance, Dads, White leather
September 25, 2019

New Trail Shoes Most Stable Thing in Local Man’s Life

September 25, 2019/ Mark Remy
New Trail Shoes Most Stable Thing in Local Man’s Life

Itinerant temp worker happy with purchase.

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September 25, 2019/ Mark Remy/
Gear, Satire
Stability, Running shoes, Trail run
September 16, 2019

‘Just Put Some Gel in the Heel or Some Shit,’ Harried Shoe Company Exec Barks at Design Team

September 16, 2019/ Mark Remy
‘Just Put Some Gel in the Heel or Some Shit,’ Harried Shoe Company Exec Barks at Design Team

CEO loses patience during marathon meeting.

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September 16, 2019/ Mark Remy/
September 09, 2019

NATHAN Sports Launches Line of Formal Hydration Vests

September 09, 2019/ Mark Remy
NATHAN Sports Launches Line of Formal Hydration Vests

Nine 2 Five® collection aims to keep office workers hydrated.

Read More
September 09, 2019/ Mark Remy/
Satire, Gear
Hydration, Nathan Sports, Vest, New gear
August 28, 2019

Tracksmith Introduces Line of 'Fun, Affordable' Casual Wear

August 28, 2019/ Mark Remy
Tracksmith Introduces Line of 'Fun, Affordable' Casual Wear

New NeonZ™ collection features eye-catching colors, $12 tees.

Read More
August 28, 2019/ Mark Remy/
Gear, Satire
Running gear, Tracksmith, Shirts, Fun
August 21, 2019

Ask Dr. Dumb: Robot Shorts!

August 21, 2019/ Mark Remy
Ask Dr. Dumb: Robot Shorts!

A new “exosuit” for the hips and thighs can boost endurance. Is it right for you?

Read More
August 21, 2019/ Mark Remy/
Gear
Robot, Exosuit, Exoskeleton, Research, Harvard, Technology run amok, Ask Dr. Dumb
July 29, 2019

Race Shirt Transforms Runner Into Something More Logo Than Man

July 29, 2019/ Mark Remy
Race Shirt Transforms Runner Into Something More Logo Than Man

Onlookers recoil at grotesque metamorphosis.

Read More
July 29, 2019/ Mark Remy/
Gear, Satire
Racing, Shirts, Logos, Sponsors, Gear
June 26, 2019

Little Headbands Can Boost Cuteness in Mice, Researchers Say

June 26, 2019/ Mark Remy
Little Headbands Can Boost Cuteness in Mice, Researchers Say

Findings may not apply to humans, authors warn.

Read More
June 26, 2019/ Mark Remy/
Satire
Research, Studies, Mice, Headbands, Cuteness
June 24, 2019

Institute for Juvenile Humor Launches ‘Boner-Conducting Headphone’ Project

June 24, 2019/ Mark Remy
Institute for Juvenile Humor Launches ‘Boner-Conducting Headphone’ Project

An unlikely group plans to enter tight market.

Read More
June 24, 2019/ Mark Remy/
Gear
New gear, Headphones, Tumescence, Electronics
May 10, 2019

Get Dumb Runner's FREE Shoe Size Tool!

May 10, 2019/ Mark Remy
Get Dumb Runner's FREE Shoe Size Tool!

Not sure what size you need? You aren’t alone.

Read More
May 10, 2019/ Mark Remy/
Gear, Satire
Running shoes, Shoe size, Tools, Let Me Google That For You, 2D printing
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Mark Remy's DumbRunner.com

DumbRunner.com is a website for runners who enjoy laughter and pie, from longtime writer and marathoner Mark Remy. Dumb Runner offers humor, insight, and 100% B.S.-free advice for runners of all abilities.

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