Cowbells Aren’t Just for Marathons, Says Marketer Sitting on Warehouse Full of Unsold Product
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For years, marathon spectators have lined race courses to cheer runners on with the help of cowbells, and it’s easy to see why—the handheld noisemakers are simple, loud, and cheap to produce. Race expos are reliable sources of branded cowbells, given away as promotional items.
Now, with marathons being canceled due to the coronavirus pandemic, one man is speaking out to remind everyone that the cowbell is a lot more versatile than most people realize.
“Cowbells have any number of uses,” said Bruce Dickinson, director of marketing for Öyster Corp, the nation’s largest manufacturer of cowbells. “They aren’t just for marathons, that’s for sure.”
Öyster Corp currently has 840,000 unsold or returned cowbells in its inventory, sources told Dumb Runner, mostly in a large warehouse south of Los Angeles.
“You can use them as a contact-free way of greeting friends,” Dickinson suggested, “or calling the family to dinner.”
“You could rig one up above your front door, with a series of hooks and string, to act as a sort of burglar alarm. Or buy a whole case with your name on them, then distribute them in your neighborhood, to raise awareness of you.”
Dickinson also mentioned that cowbells make great paperweights.
“Oh,” he added, “and if your car’s horn is broken? Use a cowbell.”
Dickinson paused.
“Ah! Duh,” he said. “Cows. If you have cows, you need cowbells, right? That one is so obvious, I bet most people don’t even think about it.”
Readers wanting to purchase cowbells in bulk from Öyster Corp should contact Dickinson directly, he said.
“Even if you already have one,” he said, “you’ve gotta have more cowbell.”
