Eco-Conscious Runner Doubly Hurt When Hit By Gas-Powered Vehicle

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In a case of adding insult to injury, a local runner hit by a driver yesterday was pained to learn that the driver’s vehicle was powered by an internal combustion engine.

In addition to being an avid runner, the victim, Mason Williams, 52, is a self-described environmental advocate and “anti-car zealot.” Williams was struck around 8:15 a.m. as he crossed a four-lane road in a crosswalk, suffering three broken ribs, a concussion, and multiple lacerations.

The driver who hit Williams, who remains unidentified, was behind the wheel of a Ram 2500 pickup truck—a hulking gasoline-powered vehicle that weighs more than 6,000 pounds and gets 12 miles per gallon in the city. Williams first noted the make and model of the vehicle as he was being loaded into an ambulance.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” said Williams. “I couldn’t at least get hit by an [electric vehicle]?”

“This is just perfect,” he added. “Burning fossil fuels and knocking me on my ass, all at once. Very efficient.”

Williams spent most of his short ride to the emergency room asking the EMTs in the ambulance whether they couldn’t just as easily be making the trip via e-bike.

The driver of the truck reportedly apologized to Williams before resuming his trip, driving to a nearby supermarket for a gallon of milk, narrowly missing a cyclist as he pulled into the parking lot.

Williams is expected to make a full recovery, which, he said, “is more than I can say for the planet.”