Churchgoer Delayed by Marathon Unleashes String of Curse Words

A local man on his way to church was incensed Sunday morning to find his usual route blocked by a stream of marathon runners.

Winston Smith, 51, was on his way to the 9 a.m. service at Our Ministry of Peace—about a three-mile drive from his home—when he encountered barriers and a police officer holding traffic at an intersection.

"Oh what the ****!" Smith shouted from his car. "What the **** is this?"

Smith's vehicle was among a half-dozen or so waiting to cross the road. Witnesses said that while none of the motorists seemed happy about the delay, Smith seemed particularly irate.

Lowering his window, the devout churchgoer and father of two made his frustration known.

Hey! ***holes! Some of us have places to go!
— Winston Smith

"Hey! ***holes!" he said. "Some of us have places to go!"

"This is bull****," he added, gesturing at the passing runners. "You have got to be ****ing kidding me."

After a few minutes of waiting, witnesses said, a gap in the field appeared and race volunteers pulled the barriers aside as the police officer waved traffic through the intersection.

"About ****ing time," Smith muttered as he pulled ahead, glaring at volunteers and spectators.

"Hey," he added, "next time try running your little race on a ****ing trail or something."

It was unclear whether Smith made it to church in time.