BREAKING: Treadmill Prompts User to Add Tip

BREAKING: Treadmill Prompts User to Add Tip

Running News from DumbRunner.com
Indecisive Runner Causes Quarter-Mile Backup at Marathon Aid Station
Indecisive Runner Causes Quarter-Mile Backup at Marathon Aid Station

“They all look so good,” says dithering man. 

Training News
Dumb Runner Illustrated #125: 'Coaching'
Dumb Runner Illustrated #125: 'Coaching'

Fartlek leads to anger…

‘I Don’t Mind Being Called a Jogger,’ Says Woman Who, Technically, Isn’t Even Jogging
‘I Don’t Mind Being Called a Jogger,’ Says Woman Who, Technically, Isn’t Even Jogging

“Why not just call yourself a walker?” source asks.

‘Running Is Torture,’ Says Man Whose Own Choices Make Running Feel Like Torture
‘Running Is Torture,’ Says Man Whose Own Choices Make Running Feel Like Torture

Local runner’s pain and discomfort is entirely self-inflicted.

Ask Dr. Dumb: Should I Be Worried About My Vertical Oscillation?
Ask Dr. Dumb: Should I Be Worried About My Vertical Oscillation?

Short answer: Nah.

Featured
New Regulations Require Graphic Warning Labels on Energy Gels
New Regulations Require Graphic Warning Labels on Energy Gels

“Fair enough,” say sports nutrition brands.

Local Woman Motivates Self by Holding Delicious Snack Inches From Mouth for Entire Run
Local Woman Motivates Self by Holding Delicious Snack Inches From Mouth for Entire Run

Tantalizing treat remains just out of reach, regardless of pace.

Report: If Local Runner’s Date Doesn’t Show Up Soon, He’s Going to Start Carb-Loading Without Him
Report: If Local Runner’s Date Doesn’t Show Up Soon, He’s Going to Start Carb-Loading Without Him

Tardiness threatens to put man's fueling plan at risk.

Local Runner Doesn’t Know Where Craving for Chocolate Pudding Came From, Doesn’t Care Where Craving for Chocolate Pudding Came From, Just Wants Chocolate Pudding
Local Runner Doesn’t Know Where Craving for Chocolate Pudding Came From, Doesn’t Care Where Craving for Chocolate Pudding Came From, Just Wants Chocolate Pudding

Sudden desire materializes during 10-mile run.