Local Runner Writing Race Report Begins 28th Paragraph With No Signs of Slowing
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A local man composing a firsthand account of his recent marathon has written nearly 1,600 words and is just getting warmed up, Dumb Runner has learned.
Herman Melville, 32, began writing late last night and got roughly 600 words in before going to bed, according to a source with direct knowledge of the situation; he resumed his work this morning, adding, at last count, another 960 words.
Melville ran the race, the Harpoon Marathon & Half, last Sunday, finishing the full marathon in a time of 3 hours 27 minutes 20 seconds. The avid runner ultimately intends to publish his report on his Facebook page, the source said.
“RACE REPORT: The Harpoon Marathon, 7/9/23,” the report begins. From there, Melville offers a detailed recounting of the day’s weather; his feelings about the race, at which he “totally blew up” last year; what he ate the night before and morning of the race; and a five-paragraph tangential story about an old friend he ran into at the race expo the day before the event.
Subsequent passages offer exhaustive looks at his four months of training for the marathon; challenges he encountered along the way, including a case of COVID and various injuries; and thoughts on no fewer than four pairs of shoes he wore during training, along with a retelling of the internal debate that ensued when he had to decide which shoes to wear on race day.
At the time of this article’s publication, Melville was beginning his race report’s 28th paragraph, in which he planned to offer an analysis of the marathon’s course and elevation profile. It was unclear when, in his writing, he might get to the start of the actual race.
Reached for comment, Melville told Dumb Runner that he always spends a lot of time crafting his race reports before sharing them online.
“If people are going to read these things,” he said, “I want them to be good.”
Multiple attempts to find anyone who has read Melville’s previous race reports were unsuccessful.
