Boston Marathon Forecast Calls for Bullshit Weather

In the final few days before the 2018 Boston Marathon, meteorologists have a warning for participants: Brace yourselves for some bullshit weather.

The latest forecasts for race day—Monday, April 16—are calling for rain, winds, and all that kind of bullshit.

Reaction among runners has not been good.

"Man, that's bullshit," said Barry Gibb, a runner in Framingham, a town on the marathon course. Gibb said bad weather won't stop him from running Monday in what will be his third Boston Marathon. But, he said, "This forecast is the last thing I need." 

Man, that’s bullshit.
— Barry Gibb, runner

Experts warn that bullshit rain can lead to any number of problems for runners, from blisters to worse-than-normal chafing to slips and falls—all of which are also bullshit.

Weather has always been a wild card at Boston. In past years, marathoners have run in everything from bullshit extreme heat to bullshit ice and snow. Bullshit headwinds are not uncommon.

The weather in eastern Massachusetts so far this year, as in much of the country, has been a seemingly never-ending stream of crazy bullshit, from a record cold snap in late December and early January to several damaging nor'easters. After weeks of cold weather, forecasters say, temperatures are finally creeping up—but that won't stop the bullshit precipitation and winds.

"I wish the news were better," said Maurice Robin, a local meteorologist. "But I'm afraid runners on Monday will indeed be dealing with some less than ideal weather."

"It's bullshit," he said. "I know."