‘Nice View,’ Says Asexual Man Running Behind Woman, Referring to Gorgeous Seascape
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A man running behind an attractive young woman on a coastal trail yesterday openly admired the scenery, Dumb Runner has learned, as he took in a sweeping vista of seaside cliffs, clear blue skies, and the ocean itself.
“Hey, nice view,” said Edwin Eugene Mayer, 31, an avid runner who has been asexual for most of his adult life. “Wow.”
The woman, identified as Barb Walters, a 26-year-old yoga instructor wearing body-hugging shorts, was running just a few feet ahead of Mayer at the time, sources said, and did not respond. It remains unclear whether she heard Mayer’s assessment.
Mayer, a single software engineer who has little to no sexual attraction to others, made several similar comments for the duration of the run, the sources said, including, “Check that out,” “oooh,” and multiple “Oh my God”s.
Mayer and Walters continued along the trail until they reached the parking lot where they had both started their runs, then separately cooled down.
“Oh, yeah, baby,” Mayer whispered as Walters bent forward into a gentle stretch, looking past her to a nearby food truck. “I need me some of that.”
After purchasing and eating a burrito, according to the sources, Mayer got into his car and drove away, apparently not noticing Walters changing her shirt behind her own vehicle’s open door.
Reached later for comment, Mayer described his run as challenging, but said that “the view” helped keep him going.
“It was hard, for sure,” he said. “But it’s always nice to have something nice to focus on, as a distraction.”
