Moron Calls Singlet ‘Tank Top’
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Left: Depositphotos.com
A local man this week referred to a running singlet as a “tank top,” Dumb Runner has learned—a gaffe that left the owner of the singlet speechless.
The man, an idiot identified as Bill Hinds, 29, delivered the stupid line Tuesday while waiting with a handful of other pedestrians to cross a busy street. Among them was a runner wearing shorts and a deep-red Brooks singlet.
“Hey,” said Hinds, addressing the runner. “I like your tank top.”
The runner, who requested anonymity when reached later, said that he decided against correcting Hinds, responding instead with a simple, “Thanks.”
“Looking back, I should have smiled and told the guy, Tanks,” the runner said. “Then again, if you’re dumb enough to call a singlet a tank top, you’re probably too dumb to appreciate a pun.”
The other bystanders remained silent, the runner said, presumably because they were embarrassed by Hinds’ cretinous remarks.
“I looked around, trying to make eye contact with someone, to say, you know, Can you believe this imbecile?” the runner said. “But everyone was either looking away or down at their phones.”
“I mean, what kind of moron can’t tell the difference between a singlet and a tank top?”
Reports that Hinds also complimented the runner’s “tennis shoes” could not be confirmed.
