Winner of Glengarry Marathon Will Get Cadillac, Race Director Says In Profanity-Filled Announcement
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Background image by Josephine Bredehoft on Unsplash
The winner of this year’s Glengarry Marathon, in Mamet, North Carolina, will receive a Cadillac Eldorado, organizers announced this morning in an R-rated video shared online.
The video begins bluntly, with Race Director Glen Ross staring at the camera and smoking a cigarette.
“Let me have your attention for a moment,” Ross says. “So you're talking about what? You're talking about bitching about that long run you missed, some son of a bitch that almost hit you with his F350, some PR you're trying to nail and so forth.”
Ross pauses to stub out his cigarette.
“Let's talk about something important,” he says. “But first, if you’re drinking coffee, put that coffee down.”
After a few moments of silence, Ross continues, saying that organizers are “adding a little something” to this year’s marathon.
“First prize is a Cadillac Eldorado,” he says. “Anyone want to see second prize?”
Ross holds a set of steak knives up to the camera.
“Second prize is a set of steak knives,” he says. “Third prize is you're banned from our event for life. You get the picture? You laughing now?”
It was unclear why Ross thought any viewers might be laughing; moments later, the video ends as abruptly as it started.
Among runners, reaction to the announcement was mixed.
“Seems a little harsh,” said one viewer who identified himself only as Moss. “They’re going to ban everyone who finished third through last? For life?”
Another viewer, calling himself Levene, was more sanguine.
“I don’t know,” he said. “I mean, those look like pretty nice knives to me.”
Reached by phone, Ross told Dumb Runner that if runners didn’t like his event’s policies, they could “hit the bricks.”
“You see, pal, that's who I am,” he said. “And you're nothing.”
”Nice guy? I don't give a shit,” he added. “Good father? Fuck you—go home and play with your kids.”
The Glengarry Marathon, held the third Sunday of November, draws a field of about 2,400 runners attracted to its flat, fast course and reliably cool weather.
