Under Armour Rolls Out 'Performance Diapers' for Runners



The sportswear giant Under Armour has unveiled its newest offering—an absorbent, form-fitting undergarment that it's billing as a "performance diaper" for endurance athletes.

The AbsorBrief® is "a game changer," the company says, "for anyone who competes in long distance athletic events," though it is being marketed primarily to runners.

A news release announcing the launch explained why:

How many times has a sudden need to use the restroom derailed a race, taking up precious seconds or minutes—maybe even costing you a PR? How many times have you barely made it to a porta potty in time—or, worse, not made it?

With Under Armour's new AbsorBrief® you can say goodbye to all of that. Simply slip one on prerace, under your normal running shorts, and then... forget it.

Need to "go" in the starting corral? Go. Have some G.I. distress mid-race? Relax— AbsorBrief®'s got this. Line too long at the post-race porta potties? Hey, guess what? You're WEARING a porta potty.

From its slim profile to its customizable fit to its patented Waste Pouch technology, AbsorBrief® has got you covered.

The product comes in four sizes—small, medium, large, and XL—and is constructed of multiple layers of a proprietary wicking material that draws moisture away from the body.

"All encased in an outer layer that is non-wicking," the press release reads. "We cannot stress that enough."

It's too early to gauge consumer interest, but at least one group has come out against the idea of runners wearing diapers.

"The very idea is preposterous," said William McKinley, president of the National Association of Portable Toilet Vendors. "I can't believe anyone will take this seriously."

"Wait," he added. "Is this real?"