SAD! This Senior Runner Was Stuck Like This for Hours, and Nobody Offered to Help
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A woman described as a “senior runner” went into an extended forward lunge in a public park this morning and remained in that position, unable to move, for hours, Dumb Runner has learned—as dozens of passersby ignored her.
The runner, identified as Jennifer Lee, 68, of Arendelle, Florida had just finished a four-mile run, a source said, when she paused on a popular multi-use path to stretch. Things went well until she lowered herself into the lunge position, bracing herself with both palms on the ground.
“And that was fine, too,” said the source, “until it became clear that she was holding the stretch way too long.”
Lee appeared calm, the source said, even as the minutes turned to hours, “although, that could be because her face was also frozen.”
She did manage to ask for help, sort of.
“Her mouth wasn’t really working very well,” said the source, “so she sounded sort of like the Tin Man from ‘The Wizard of Oz,’ when he’s rusted. Imagine someone saying ‘HELP’ but without moving their lips.”
During Lee’s ordeal, nearly 100 walkers, cyclists, and fellow runners passed by, none of whom offered to ask whether Lee was OK or if she needed assistance. Most were looking at phones or “zoned out” with headphones or earbuds in, or both.
At least two dogs paused to urinate on Lee, the source added.
“It was really pretty said,” they said, neglecting to explain why they themselves didn’t step up to help. “People today are so self-involved.”
Eventually, an errant skateboarder brushed Lee’s side, knocking her over and breaking the spell.
“After that, she sort of shook herself out, looked around, and walked away,” the source said. “I doubt she’ll be performing that stretch again.”
